Since embarking on this voyage of fitness I have really noticed a lot of changes in my emotional state. I have become very aware of my feelings, and my ability to express them. I think sharing something so personal as weight with the world will do that to you, and since I am trying to go full throttle on all aspects of this experience I have decided to start sharing stories in my life that have affected my weight problem. Read at your own risk.
I was in the seventh grade and the spring semester had just started up. We came back to school, and I was still a little upset about not making the basketball team the past November. During the break I really didn’t do much activity, and when I went to Athletics it really showed because one of the coaches made us run some “cream to the top” (I think that’s what it was called) drills and I was getting smoked. Well one coach was not very happy with this and he took me inside and asked if I had gained any weight during the break, and I said no. He then asked me how much I weighed before we went to break and I said about 220. He then proceeded to put me on the scale and I was 220 (I was so happy that number came up, because I was so scared at the moment in time). Well the coach then brings me into his office to talk to me. He begins to ask me why I tried out for basketball, and I told him because I knew I was good, and I felt I could make the team. He then proceeded to tell me that I was way too big to ever play basketball, and that I could never play basketball for him at the weight I was at…I could not help but just begin to ball in the room uncontrollably. I have never in my life felt so bad about myself. Until then I had thought I was in okay shape. He told me to get my act straight or not show up anymore and left the room. My life really changed from that moment. I went from 220 to the end of summer being around 270. I completely lost confidence in myself, and lost a lot of my athleticism.
This moment hurt me, and I can still remember that feeling, but now it is only fuel for me reaching my goals. I will not let anyone get in my way, and I will not give up when others do. I have to be strong for everyone who wants to see me succeed, and I want to succeed to give others the inspiration to do it themselves!
RICKY OUT!
4 comments:
So proud of you, Ricky! I know it's hard to put yourself out there but you're being so brave and it's an inspiration to everyone!! Keep it up!
I think that coach was so wrong! You were always an awesome basketball player. His loss!
You make us all proud! jojo
Ricky,
I just read your post, and I am overcome with a myriad of emotions right now.... That coach did a terrible thing that day. How I wish I would have just been passing by and overheard this as it happened back then! He deserves to have his callous, egocentric, dream crushing, butt kicked. He should never have worked as a coach again after that. We are to lift one another up, to encourage--not tear down.
I believe as you do that this had a direct negative effect on you. But, though you gained weight afterwards, Rick, he did not win. Even if you didn't play basketball in school. You are an amazing person who has so much to thankful for because of all you have going for you.
I truly am proud of you for doing what you are to get healthy and stay healthy. You keep the faith and just know what a blessing you are to everyone who knows you. Go Ricky!
Best,
Tammy Harris
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