MY FORMER MENU

I smelled something very familiar the other day while driving...Wendy’s! I thought to myself how it's been such a long time since I ate there, but I remembered when I went there I had been responsible with my choices and got the Chicken Mandarin Salad (which turned out to be fine). It did, however, make me think of all the bad food choices I used to make just a couple months ago, and now I don’t think I could stomach most of them. So I came up with a list of some of the major fast food places I used to frequent and what my normal order would be.

McDonalds – 20 piece McNugget. Super Size Fries. Large Dr. Pepper. 3-4 packs of BBQ Sauce.

Wendy’s – Spicy Chicken Sandwich combo no veggies. Large Fry and Large Dr. Pepper. Order of 5 nuggets. Order of junior bacon cheeseburger, no veggies.

Papa John’s – Large pepperoni pizza. Breadsticks. 3 packs of garlic butter sauce.

Chic-Fil-A – Chic-Fil-A sandwich no pickles. 8 pack of chic-fil-a nuggets. Large Fry. Large Dr. Pepper.

Dunkin Donuts – 4 strawberry filled powdered sugar donuts. Large Chocolate Milk.

Burger King – 2 chicken sandwiches, no lettuce. Large onion rings. Large Dr. Pepper.

Sonic – Chicken Toaster Sandwich, no veggies. Route 44 ocean water. Sonic Size tater tots with cheese.

Fazoli’s – Chicken Paramgiana. 2 baskets of breadsticks. Large Dr. Pepper.

Whataburger – Grilled Chicken sandwich with bacon and cheese only. Large fry. Large Dr. Pepper. Apple pie.

Jack in the Box – Chicken strips. Bacon Bacon Cheeseburger. Large curly fries. Large Dr. Pepper.

Long John Silver’s – 5 piece combo (2 Fish, 3 Chicken). Large Fry. Six hushpuppies. Large Dr. Pepper.

Looking at this list now, it almost makes me want to throw up it's so disgusting. I can’t imagine trying to eat that much food. I can really see that one of my old problems was portion control. I had no control over how much food I put in my body, irrespective of the horrible quality of the food. I also waited way too long between meals, so I would be starving when I ate, and that is just asking for trouble. I would have put what I get at all these places now but the problem is I haven’t been to most of them since I started working out. I think that is something I really need to start looking into as I get into my "maintain phase" of this journey. I will have to come face to face with these places more and I need to be ready to make healthy choices.

ENCHANTED ROCK

My friend Lisa came into town a little while ago, and on Valentines Day she wanted to go to Enchanted Rock with some friends. She asked me if I wanted to go, and at first I was pretty hesitant about accepting the invite. The last time I went to Enchanted Rock I was very young and I remember it being quite high. The old worries of not being able to do an outdoor activity came back, and the anxiety that I would slow the group down crept up. But Lisa sounded so excited about going that I wanted to join in on the fun. 

 

When we got there one fact just kept running through my mind…The top of Enchanted Rock was about 1800 feet high. I thought back to a couple of weeks ago when I was with David and we were doing the nature walks that were about 500 feet high. Those nature walks were pretty tough, and I was thinking that I have to more than triple that elevation to get to the top.  Over-analyzing is something I have always done, and sometimes it can psyche me out of doing certain things, but I wanted to test my body to see how far I have come since July. 

 

As we began the climb I could tell my body was in for a challenge.  Since I do a lot of my cardio on machines I wasn’t used to walking on uneven ground. My ankles were going in all kinds of directions and that is always a scary sign for me because I have such weak ankles. With all this going on I pushed forward and continued to climb higher. There were a couple of times that we had to do a little bit of a climb onto a higher rock, and each time I was able to easily clear whatever was in the way. Once again I was really shocked by how much progress I had made and how easy things were for me to do. 

 

When you are just looking up at the top of the rock you lose sight of how high you have climbed. We got around the halfway point of the hike and took a little break. The best part of the break was that I really didn't need the break because I was tired, but because it was just so cold outside and we wanted to get out of the wind for a second.  As we continued the climb, I kept waiting to get out of breath and break it to everyone that I needed to stop.  But it never came. I just kept going and going. It was such an unexpected feeling to have. 

 

We finally reached the top of Enchanted Rock and the view was just amazing. What was even better was that I got to do it with some great friends.  As we stood at the top, one thought kept coming to my head, “I would have never been able to do this six months ago.”  I wasn’t sad for myself-- I was more excited about the fact that I am taking care of what has always held me back from doing things like hiking Enchanted Rock. For such a long time I would have said 'no' to going, but now that I went and got to experience the excitement you get from hiking all the way to the top, I know I have been doing something right in my life. Then I kept thinking that if I could hike up Enchanted Rock with ease, what is next for me? What will I conquer next?

SOMETHING TO THINK ABOUT

I stumbled across this web site Natural Physiques that has a calculator to show you how far you have come in your weight loss. As of today I am down 104 pounds, so here are my stats for what that equates to in several categories. 

 

How Much Fuel Is That?

To lose that amount of fat would mean to burn 364,000 calories or 1,522,976 KiloJoules! That is the equivalent of 11.74 gallons of gasoline. Humans, however, are far more efficient than cars, getting about 912 "miles to the gallon". If you could dump this many calories into the tank of a Honda Civic, you would be able to drive it about 399 miles before running out of gas!

Let's see how your goal would convert to other forms of fuel. 364,000 calories is equivalent to:

        11.74 gallons of gasoline, or

        130.05 pounds of coal, or

        180.65 pounds of oven-dried wood, or

        15.94 gallons of propane

This amount of energy would ...

        Brew about 1,015 pots of coffee, or

        Light a 60-watt light bulb for 7,051 hours ( 294 days = 0.83 years)

Cutting 364,000 calories is the same as saying "no" to:

        4,550 apples, or

        3,640 bananas, or

        21,412 cups of cabbage (whew!), or

        2,510 baked potatoes, or

        4,550 large eggs, or

        3,033 cups of 2% milk, or

        262 pounds of ground beef, or

        4,184 glasses of wine, or

        1,127 Snickers bars, or

        1,517 Clif Bars ( 2,022 Luna Bars), or

        2,619 cans of Coke, or

        2,141 pints of Guinness beer, or

        740 Big Macs, or

        707 Quarter Pounders with Cheese, or

        520 Whoppers, or

        1,103 Subway 6" Oven Roasted Chicken Breast sandwiches, or

        2,141 Taco Bell crunchy tacos, or

        1,549 slices of pepperoni pizza from Pizza Hut

What it Takes to Burn 364,000 Calories

To burn 364,000 calories, a 190 pound male would have to:

        Backpack for 603 hours (25 days) nonstop, or

        Walk for 1,395 hours (58 days) at 3 mph straight, or

        Walk 4,184 miles (2,615 kilometers), or

        Bike for 1,055 hours (44 days) at 10 mph, or

        Bike 10,551 miles (6,594 kilometers), or

        Play basketball nonstop for 581 hours 24 days), or

        Play billiards for 1,685 hours (70 days), or

        Go bowling for 1,405 hours (59 days), or

        Stay on the golf course for 1,055 hours (44 days), or

        Spend 469 hours (20 days) playing competitive football, or

        Jump rope for 443 hours (18 days) straight!

You would have to walk the length of England about 7.03 times to burn 364,000 calories.

How Long it Will Take?

The range for safe weight loss is about 1 to 3 pounds of fat per week. It could take anywhere between 35 to 104 weeks (8 to 24 months) to safely and reasonably lose that amount of weight.

 

 

They also had some other calculators for how many calories you should burn in a week based on your weight, a better version of how to measure your Body Mass Index and a bunch of others. 

WHAT I EAT DURING A TYPICAL DAY

I was asked if I could provide a rundown of what I eat on a normal day…here goes.

Breakfast

•     I take a cup of frozen strawberries and a cup of frozen blueberries and I put them into a blender. I fill it up with water and throw in some Metamucil. Blend it all together and you get a decent enough smoothie.
•     1 cup bell peppers
•     2-3 pieces of turkey bacon.
•     A carbohydrate source like bread or oatmeal.

Meal 1

•     Six ounce Pork baked.
•     1 cup of spinach
•     1 ounce almonds

Meal 2

•     Six-ounce chicken breast baked.
•     1 cup of carrots
•     1 cup brown rice

Meal 3

•     Protein shake (I use skim milk to mix my protein shake and usually throw in a cup of fruit)
•     1 cup of green peas.

Meal 4

•     Six ounce steak grilled.
•     Salad with dressing on the side and used sparingly.

And that would be a day’s worth of food for me. This is just an example of what I would eat but it’s not always the same. And I would be lying if I said I followed this everyday but this is my template. Sometimes I will eat more meals, sometimes I will eat less but four is usually good enough for me. If I miss a meal at any point I always try to carry a protein bar with me to at least get something down that is low calorie and will help fight the hunger. So on any given day I am eating usually about 4-6 cups of vegetables and 3-5 cups of fruit. This is an extreme change from how I used to eat. At first I was having an extremely hard time adjusting to it but you eventually get over the initial shock of this eating pattern and at least for me, you flourish.

TRIPLE DIGITS

Sometimes in life you do things that you never thought you would: Talk to the prettiest girl in the room, jump out of a plane, sing the national anthem at a baseball game. The list can be varied, but in general there are things that people put in their minds which are almost understood as impossibilities. Number one on that list, for me, is losing over 100 pounds. As many times as I have tried to lose my weight, I have never gotten past 50 pounds. At that point, I would usually start to slip into my old ways, and things would just spiral down from there. I would usually gain it all back-- and more. Then I would try another diet, and the cycle felt like it would never end.  Well, this time it's different, and I think the quote, “Never, Never, Never Give Up” really fits this situation.

 

The day I did my first workout I weighed 370 pounds.

Today, I am 269 pounds. 

Hitting the triple digits has taken so much hard work, dedication and commitment to the idea that I can’t eat a rotation of pizza, chicken fingers, fettuccini alfredo and pancakes. Also, accepting that I am the only person responsible for what I do with my life is a huge part of my accomplishments. If I don’t work out, it's no one else’s fault but my own. If I eat too many chips at the restaurant, I can’t complain that the waiter is too good at his job, it's my fault for being a chips-and-salsa-eating machine. Ultimately, being responsible for your own actions and realizing how many positive things you can accomplish come from healthy choices.

 

I was trying to remember the last time I weighed this much, and I came to the conclusion that it had to be somewhere around the 8^th grade.  It’s hard to wrap my head around the fact that all through high school I was bigger than I am now.  I don’t remember feeling that big, but that is part of the problem. I never really looked into the mirror and said “WOW I have really let myself go! Maybe I should do something about this.” Instead, I just made a goofy face and went on with my day thinking everything would be okay.

 

With every milestone I hit, I try to appreciate how far I have come with my workouts and overall health.  Sometimes, you forget how far you have come until you compare pictures, or visit someone you haven’t seen in a while to really get the full spectrum. But with every small goal achieved, the ultimate goal still looms. I realize that I have a lot of work left if I am serious about hitting my target number by July.

CHANGES IN DIET

Food has always been the trap for any weight loss program I have tried. When I first started with Workshop Fitness I was afraid that the diet would be too hard to follow and I would just fail yet again. Thankfully, I loved the plan of a very simple diet of 4-5 meals a day consisting of six ounces of protein at every meal and at least one cup of vegetables. You add a couple things here and there but that is the basic structure of the diet. This was working really well for about the first 90 pounds, but recently my weight hasn’t been dropping. Some this was that I have been eating pretty much the same amount of food the whole time. The only problem with that is when you lose 90+ pounds your body begins to burn way less calories. A rough estimate of how many calories my body burned at my starting weight was about 3200 calories a day. At my weight now it's around 2600 calories. These are both rough estimates, but since I have lost the ability to burn about 600 calories a day over the course of six months, I really had to figure out something different to do with my diet, or else I felt I would be stuck at my same weight.

 

So I went to my head trainer, Thomas, to ask him what I should do. He suggested that instead of having a diet that was high in protein all the time we switch up the diet. I was a little hesitant because what we had been doing was working pretty well in my book. What Thomas wanted to do was lower the amount of protein I was getting three days a week and on those days increase the amount of carbohydrates. I would do this by eating oatmeal in the mornings, and then having some brown rice with one of my later meals. I would also have to cut the ounces in each protein for that day in half (3 oz. instead of 6 oz.).

 

The change in the diet has resulted in a steady loss in weight again. I have lost about 8 pounds in the past two weeks.  This probably isn’t the last time my diet will change, and I am just going to have to take the changes in stride because I am closer to my goal weight than I really have ever been in my entire life. Here is to using food as fuel!

A TRIUMPH AT THE GYM

This past weekend I traveled to Dallas to see some friends of mine. While I was there I got in a nice workout session with my friend Todd. We started off with four games of racquetball. The last time we played each other was about a year and a half ago, and I got completely crushed each game. I was so out of shape that I could barely stay with the guy. Fast forward to present day, and unfortunately I still got destroyed. I think the most I scored in one of the games was six points, (you need 15 to win) so not very impressive, but Todd told me that I had greatly improved from our previous game, and that it was a much harder challenge this time.  I felt that I was staying with him during the game from a stamina standpoint, but he had me beat when it came to skill, such as controlling where the ball went. I just sort of swing and let it go wherever it wants. After those four games I was pretty exhausted, but Todd still had more in store…he wanted to do the stair stepper machines.

 

I haven’t really talked about my relationship with the stair stepper, but I think I need to come out and say this: I absolutely hate that stupid machine! When I had my first attempt of losing weight and I was working out at 24- Hour Fitness, I would always attempt the stair stepper with little success. The best I ever did was an 8 minute workout that would leave me on the ground requiring some sort of respiratory assistance. I could never conquer this dumb exercise. Thankfully, Workshop didn’t have one, so I never had to get on one until hanging out with my friend Todd. 

 

As we walked up to the stair steppers I asked Todd how long he usually goes on these things. When he responded with 20 minutes I was about to laugh in his face. Do you really think I can do 12 minutes more than I have ever done on here after just finishing up four racquetball games? Are you just trying to embarrass me with your amazing physical attributes? Do you enjoy seeing me in pain? I didn’t really ask any of these questions I just pretended to man up and responded in my deepest voice, “cool dude.”

 

About two minutes into the workout, my legs started to give.  It was one of those warning signs that maybe I wasn’t ready for this intense of a workout. I made it five minutes and Todd decided that we both need to increase the level by one.  I started to lean against the handlebars of the machine. But another five minutes passed, and I stood up as I raised the level again.  My legs still hurt but the pain hadn't increased. I was completely shocked that I went over 10 minutes and felt okay. Another 5 minutes passed and we hit the home stretch. I kept trying to remember what my trainers tell me all the time, “No matter what you are doing always finish.” The last minute is  made my whole body ache in pain but I knew I had to do it to prove to myself that I can. Twenty minutes popped up on the screen and I jumped off the machine and ran to the water fountain!

 

It happened…I really couldn't believe I just added 12 minutes to my least favorite exercise. Things like that shouldn't happen, but when I stopped doubting myself and just focused on finishing I engineered my own success.  What I love most about this moment is when I am feeling like I can’t finish something I will remind myself of this workout. The pain created, the sweat that dripped and the smile that was on my face as I finished what I started

Dudley and Bob Spot 2/4

Went on the Dudley and Bob show this morning to talk about my six month mark. Also some more comparison shots.


Dudley and Bob 2/4







July 2009

February 2010

And in july I was pushing for dear life to just get my arms that close...Now I just look like a band nerd.

CALL FROM A FRIEND

I recently received a call from my friend Michael about my post, “A Moment I Would Like to Forget." He first let me know how proud he was of me, but he also was shocked to find out how bad it had gotten. I had to inform him that worse stories will be coming, and to not worry about the past because the present is going swimmingly

His phone call did, however, make me feel that I was being a bad friend to him, and to others, during my times of weight struggle. I am sure Michael thought that though I wasn’t in the happiest place, I was still doing okay. I wish it was the case, but I was in my own personal hell, eating my life away. The experiences I have over that time really put me in such a low place, a place few other people-- if any-- knew of.
I am also realizing that I tried to be much funnier at my heavier weight. I was making how I felt by making others laugh. Now that the weight is coming off, I don’t worry so much about making people laugh as I do about genuinely making them smile.

I would try to make people laugh so that they would like me. I felt horrible, like "why would anyone want to hang out with someone as big as me?" This question would run through my head constantly. I am no doctor, but it can’t be the healthiest thing to be thinking about. The battle for acceptance when being overweight is something that is hard to describe. You feel you have to win a person over because their initial reaction of you is something along the lines of, “Oh, this person is unhealthy, fat and probably pretty boring." Maybe that was true, maybe it wasn't. What is true was that is how I felt I was perceived. My best example of this was when I lived in San Marcos with my buddies Kyle and Nick. We had the perfect living space to throw parties so of course we had people over all the time. When it was people I already had established relationships with I was alright and nothing really bothered me. But if new people were around? Forget it. I would be the last person to introduce myself, the last person to strike up a conversation. Most of the people I met in college I either met in class or through someone else. I never met new people on my own in a social environment like a party or something. Maybe that is normal, but before college I had been so social with people that I couldn't wrap my head around where that personality went. It was like the new expectations associated with college crushed me while others flourished.

You just can’t go through life like that. Feeling intimidated in situations is only natural, but when you are always thinking people are judging you, then you will never be the person that you want to be. Finding confidence in yourself is so important. It took me a while to figure this out, but I am seeing it now and that is what matters. I hope the people who read this will not think I am looking for sympathy, but rather letting it be known to others who are overweight that they are not alone in the feelings they have.

Video Montage

So last week I posted a video of someone's video montage of their weight loss. Then I thought, wouldn't it be great to do one myself? And so I did...If you don't like the strokes feel free to mute the video I won't be hurt. ENJOY PEOPLE!

WEIGHT CHART

I have been getting questions about how much weight I have lost from week-to-week, so I feel that sharing a spreadsheet of my progress would be an easy way to get everyone involved. As you can tell, there are good weeks and bad weeks, but every week I sweat the same, I ate pretty much the same, but the weight came off at different rates. That has been one of the biggest things to overcome, so far: the feeling of failure when you weigh yourself on the scale. The best way to overcome this is realizing that this journey is a marathon, not a sprint,and you can’t have uniform change. Numbers are great and they give you markers for how far you have come, but there are more important things at this point. For instance, seeing someone smile because of the lifestyle changes I have taken on, or knowing that someone has gained inspiration from my actions to get themselves healthy. Those are what really matter to me, and thankfully you guys are responding!

		Change in Pounds		% Change
Date	Weight	Last Week	Start	Last Week	Start
7/23/09	370.00
7/30/09	362.00	8.00	8.00	2.1622%	2.1622%
8/6/09	362.00	0.00	8.00	0.0000%	2.1622%
8/13/09	360.00	2.00	10.00	0.5525%	2.7027%
8/20/09	355.00	5.00	15.00	1.3889%	4.0541%
8/27/09	351.00	4.00	19.00	1.1268%	5.1351%
9/3/09	348.00	3.00	22.00	0.8547%	5.9459%
9/10/09	347.00	1.00	23.00	0.2874%	6.2162%
9/17/09	337.00	10.00	33.00	2.8818%	8.9189%
9/24/09	335.00	2.00	35.00	0.5935%	9.4595%
10/1/09	333.00	2.00	37.00	0.5970%	10.0000%
10/8/09	329.00	4.00	41.00	1.2012%	11.0811%
10/15/09	322.00	7.00	48.00	2.1277%	12.9730%
10/22/09	321.00	1.00	49.00	0.3106%	13.2432%
10/29/09	316.00	5.00	54.00	1.5576%	14.5946%
11/5/09	314.00	2.00	56.00	0.6329%	15.1351%
11/12/09	309.00	5.00	61.00	1.5924%	16.4865%
11/19/09	303.00	6.00	67.00	1.9417%	18.1081%
11/26/09	303.00	0.00	67.00	0.0000%	18.1081%
12/3/09	299.00	4.00	71.00	1.3201%	19.1892%
12/10/09	299.00	0.00	71.00	0.0000%	19.1892%
12/17/09	299.00	0.00	71.00	0.0000%	19.1892%
12/24/09	292.00	7.00	78.00	2.3411%	21.0811%
12/31/09	289.00	3.00	81.00	1.0274%	21.8919%
1/7/10	287.00	2.00	83.00	0.6920%	22.4324%
1/14/10	283.00	4.00	87.00	1.3937%	23.5135%
1/21/10	280.00	3.00	90.00	1.0601%	24.3243%

SIX MONTH MARK TOMORROW

(DEC 08)

It is hard for me to imagine that it has been six months since I started. 

Looking at pictures from July gives me chills, and even looking at pictures from October helps me realize how much progress I have made. The halfway point is here and it still feels like I am just starting. Next week I will post my six-month mark-- inches lost and weight lost-- but I haven’t been posting them because I still haven’t seen my old trainer, Diana, to get them done (communication breakdown! My bad guys.). 

The numbers don’t matter as much as they used to.

(JAN 10)

 

When I first started this, all I could think about was how much weight I was losing, or how many inches were coming off. When it wasn't coming off as fast as in the beginning, around month 3-4, I started getting frustrated and was losing faith that my body would still change. It was only after talking to all my trainers and getting their input that I felt better about how my weight loss would slow down. My body would still be building muscle, I would still gain endurance and I would still see my body transform-- I just had to have patience. It was that kind of assurance that has really pushed me away from the idea of looking at the numbers towards really just worrying about the experiences.

 

3 months ago, I couldn’t have played a game of pick up football in the park with my buddies for 2 hours. 6 months ago, I wouldn’t have had the confidence to get a number from a girl I had barely talked to.  There are just so many experiences that have occurred in the last six months that have really shaped my life in a new direction. 

(JAN 10)

 

But with all the good things that are coming my way, I also need to come to the realization that I am not done yet, that I need to find new ways to be active and new ways to be social. If I sit satisfied, letting the complacency build, I will remain static, something that I don't want. Although I am incredibly happy where I am, I know that there is still so much more work to get done.

A MOMENT I WOULD LIKE TO FORGET

As I approach the six-month mark of my weight loss journey, I have realized that as my weight decreases, my world has become a much happier place. To make sure it stays that way, I often try to remember some of my lowest moments in life so that I won’t let myself get back there again.
This is one from about two years ago.

 I was doing an internship with a media company in Austin while still attending Texas State in San Marcos. The business I was interning for was relatively close to my grandmother’s house. I would sleep over there two nights a week so that I wouldn’t have to make such a crazy drive in the mornings I had the internship. One night, when I had to make the drive to my grandmother’s house, I decided that I would do my normal stop at McDonald’s and grab a bite to eat. Because I hadn’t eaten since that morning I was starving, and I decided to treat myself to a 20 piece Chicken Mcnugget meal (Large fry and large coke included). When I pulled into the driveway of my grandmother's house, I was about to walk in when I realized that I didn’t want my grandma to see me eat such a huge meal, so I ate the McDonald’s in my car instead.

Chomping down on the food, I always loved to cover the nuggets in McDonald’s BBQ sauce (the only way to eat these things, may I add) and as I was about to put it in my mouth some of the sauce fell on me. Except that it didn’t hit my shirt, it hit my belly.
I looked down and my shirt wasn’t covering my stomach.
The shirt I just recently bought for my internship couldn't even cover my gigantic stomach…A 5X SHIRT COULDN’T CONTAIN WHAT I HAD DONE TO MYSELF. I really don’t know what I weighed at this point, because I never got on the scale, but when a 5X shirt can’t cover your body, it hits hard.
I began to cry uncontrollably in the car as I still ate the food. I couldn’t believe how little control I had over myself. The food made me sick, hate myself and was tearing my life apart, but I still ate every last bite. I sat in the car and cried even after the food was gone because I realized at that moment that my life would be over soon. I had no control over what my body did. It only knew pleasure from food, and even though I knew it was crippling everything I wanted myself to become, I still let it happen.
I cleared up the tears and walked into my grandma’s house as if nothing was wrong. That night I made a promise to myself that I would take full advantage of anything that came my way with losing weight.

I thought that promise would be fulfilled with being a contestant on “The Biggest Loser,” but that never panned out. Eighteen months later, Workshop Fitness has become everything I could have dreamed of and more. With their help I have lost 90 pounds off my starting weight. With their help I have gained more confidence than I ever thought I could have had and with their help I will become the person that the guy eating 20 nuggets in a car while crying will never recognize.

PICK UP BASKETBALL GAME

I have previously written about my love for basketball a couple of times. As a child it was one of the activities I truly excelled at, and as my weight increased, my skills diminished. My ability to be as effective as I once was also went by the way side. I had forgotten what basketball meant to me. I just couldn’t accept the fact that I wasn’t in good enough shape to feel worthy of playing.

Luckily, I rediscovered my love for basketball last Sunday.

One of my friends is a coach in the area, and was telling me he had to run the open gym at his high school. Another friend of mine asked me if I wanted to go up there and play some basketball with the high school kids. I really wasn’t sure about it, because although I knew I was in the best shape I had been in years, was I ready to see what I was made of on the basketball court?

As I walked into the gym a lot of old memories came back to me that hadn’t really resurfaced in a long time. Memories of my childhood: spending hours in gyms going to basketball tournaments, participating in summer camps and practicing long hours with my dad.

There is a certain smell that basketball courts have that no other place on this earth has.  Our sense of smell is our strongest sense in terms of memory recall, and for me, walking into the gym, with that musky, enameled-wood smell brought me back to my youth in a way that is hard to explain. The smell reassures you that life can be stopped and that for a short period, you can go back to better times. 

I grabbed a basketball and started shooting around.

Let me tell you this-- it did not come back to me, at first.  I was missing all over the place, and I could barely dribble the ball. I once felt invincible on the basketball court, yet now I had feelings of doubt and discouragement. That really only lasted for about the first 15-20 minutes, because I started hitting shots, dribbling between my legs and I could move around with more ease than I can ever remember. So when the opportunity arose to get in a 5 on 5 game, I was feeling prepared to get after it.

The last time I played a pick-up game was at Texas State, probably about two years ago. I was on my first attempt to lose weight, and I had gone from about 400 to 360. I felt I was ready to get down on some basketball, and some guys let me jump in. Oh, boy was I wrong.

 I was winded within five minutes, and I barely did anything for my team. This is what I feared as we were starting the game, the fear that even after another 70 pounds lost I still would not be ready to play a significant role in a basketball game.

As the game started I didn’t really know what to do or where to stand. It had just been so long since I last played. Thankfully, I had an old buddy on my team that I used to play with all the time and he was guiding me. The first couple of times I had my hands on the ball I was feeling nervous and cautious, not really knowing what to do. But it all slowly came back to me, and I just felt like things started clicking as soon as I scored my first bucket.

 I got tired as the game progressed, but I never felt completely winded. I also felt faster with the ball than I have ever really felt on the court. I kept having all these thoughts about myself playing basketball in my late teens. When I was in middle school I was a king, and even early in high school I could hang with a lot of the players, but around junior year I just couldn’t play to the level I expected from myself.

And for me, it all came back. And I was better than ever. I was in better shape than anytime in high school- or ever, for that matter- and it showed. 

The game lasted for about an hour, but the memory of the game will last a long time.

During this journey of getting in shape, losing weight, creating confidence for myself and living life I sometimes over look the small things that once brought me so much joy.  I forgot that I used to love basketball so much that it was my literally my life. Now that I got a glimpse of what I have been missing for all these years I have no plans of losing it now, and the possibilities of my improvement make each day that much more exciting.

NEW YEARS RESOLUTIONS

2009 was a great year.

I had some experiences I will look back on later in life and think, “Man, it does not really get any better than that."  With the new year upon us, I am ready to look over the past year and get my new goals ready for 2010 so I make sure I don’t lose focus in my weight loss journey.

 

In 2009, I wanted to be 290 pounds by December 31^st.  I reached this goal on December 30^th, when I weighed in at 289 pounds!  For the year, I lost a total of 81 pounds.  That is hard to type because it doesn’t feel real.  Telling myself that you are smaller than when you were in high school is a little scary, because I look at myself and I have a hard time believing that I was this big in 9^th grade, but it is true.  As I get smaller and smaller, I will have to think about the 7^th and 6^th grade times just to remember even being this small. 

My goal weight is 190 pounds by July 23rd, which is what I weighed in about the 6th grade.  Let that roll around your head a little bit.  July 23rd is the one-year anniversary of this whole thing, so I figured it was apt a date as any.  I got 99 pounds to go in a little under 7 months.  The race to the end will be tight, but I have faith.

 

In 2009, I also wanted to bench press 200 pounds by the end of the year. This has always been a goal of mine.  I have always had leg strength but never upper body.  When I started lifting at Workshop Fitness my first max lift was 160 pounds back on July 23^rd.  Last week, I did 200 pounds for the first time! It was a battle with the bar, but after two times of almost giving up I powered through it and made it happen.  What is crazy is when I last lifted 160, I was weighing in at around 370, but now I lifted 200 and weighed 290, so I am getting closer and closer to being able to lift myself up from  a ledge-- just in case I fall. The goal for bench press is to be able to lift 250 by, once again, July 23^rd.

 

Finally, I wanted to get to a 15 minute mile.

I sort of crushed this goal, because I had the 15 minute mile by Thanksgiving, and then I got a 12 minute mile the week before Christmas.  Now, I am looking to get a 7 minute mile by July 23^rd. When I first started I was walking 20 minute miles, and being exhausted after 2.  I just did 2 miles at about a 13 minute pace and felt okay, after.  I want to increase speed, but also increase my distance.  Small steps, people, but we will get the stamina in there, too.

Some personal goals for 2010 are to continue to eat healthier, read more, become more involved with religion and faith and to finally stop to smell the roses every once in awhile. This last goal is really hard for me because I am trying to never be satisfied with what I do until I have truly reached a goal, but I have to realize that every step in the process is something to be proud of whether it be a step forward or backwards.  I am sure I will come up with 20 more resolutions as this year moves on, but for me they all lead to one giant goal in mind: Making myself happy, and if I can do that then I have achieved what life is all about. 

IT FINALLY HAPPENED

This week in Houston I did something that I haven’t done since I was almost 13 years old and I the reality of the situation hasn’t hit yet. I finally bought clothes that were not sold at a big and tall store! It did not come easy though and I will tell you why.

It all started this past weekend as I was searching for Christmas style clothes for a party I was going to. I thought that it was a tacky Christmas party and I had nothing to wear for it. So I went to Casual Male Big and Tall to look for something I could wear but they had nothing as I expected (I don’t think Casual Male understands that if they had some funny Christmas clothes that young overweight people would snatch them up because tacky Christmas parties are all the rage these days). So I decided that I would brave going to Target to look for a Christmas shirt.

I went to the men’s department to find something that was suitable and I luckily came across a “Mr. Grinch” t-shirt. Walking into the dressing room I felt nervous about putting the shirt on. I had worked so hard to lose about 80 pounds now and to not get in this shirt would make me feel like it was for nothing. Then I remembered that this whole experience is about becoming someone new so I told myself if it doesn’t fit it will soon enough with all the work you are putting yourself through. Cautiously I threw the shirt over my head and slid it on and it fit! I did a little jig in the dressing room for my minor celebration and then realized that I was about to purchase a shirt from Target, not Casual Male. I have spent almost have my life up to this point buying shirts, pants, belts, you name it at one store and now I was getting closer and closer to ending that trend. So what did I do after I found out I could fit in the shirt? Of course I went back out to find some other clothes that would fit and I found an awesome jacket that fit me too. The best part is that I spent a fraction of what I normally spent on clothes at Big and Tall at Target.

What this all boils down to for me is that sometimes it is hard for me to see how much change my body has gone through but when a moment like this occurs I know that I am doing something right for myself. Five months ago I would have laughed at the notion of buying clothes at Target but now I wonder where my next purchase will be because I am no longer bound by fat guy law to Casual Male.

TAKING THE GOOD WITH THE BAD

There is some good news and some bad news that has surfaced in the past couple of days that I would like to share with everyone. I will start with the bad news, but it will lead into some pretty awesome news. 

 

This past week I was asked to go meet with my trainer Diana after our workout. We walked over to the coffee shop right next to the gym and that is where she told me she would no longer be training at Workshop Fitness. I did not see that coming. Diana was the first trainer I worked out with, and she does all my measurements at the end of the month to chart my progress. I was acting tough because that is what a man is supposed to do, but I was not handling it very well inside. It has been almost five months with her, and losing such a key part of my training team was a crushing blow.  That is until she hit me up with the good news.

 

Diana and Thomas (The trainer that heads this project) have a company called Physique Foods that I have mentioned a couple times on my blog before. They offer food based on the diet they created, a diet that I am currently on. This is when Diana offered to begin supplying me with my food starting in January. Her title would change from “Ricky’s Trainer” to “Ricky’s Nutrionist."  I could not believe what I was hearing…Free food to go along with the training? I no longer have to worry about cooking? What about my beloved Shake ‘n Bake? After the initial shock wore off I gave her a huge hug and told here this is great news. Getting supplied food only makes the goal of 180 pounds in one year that much easier and obtainable. The best part is that their food is great!

 

I am so pumped to spread the word on Physique Foods and to practice my photo skills as I take some pictures of typical meals they provide me with.  This really couldn’t have come at a better time, because my eating habits were beginning to slide. Earlier this month I had peas taken out of my meals (They are too starchy). This really threw me off because I was eating peas 3-4 times a day (I think I was going to turn into something green eventually-- but would that really have been that bad?)

 

When the trainers took that off my meal plan, I was having a hard time substituting for the ease of making peas. Recently I have been eating bags of spinach like they are chips but I can see that getting old real fast. The shredded carrots were also being treated like pretzel sticks. However, Physique Foods will offer me an array of vegetables to pick from, and the variety will get my taste buds on full alert. So thank you, Physique Foods for joining the party!